11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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