I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
third nipple confirmed
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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