ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
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Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
We talked him into tasing himself.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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