I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
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make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize