There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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