I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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