i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
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I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
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