Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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