Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
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Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
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Naked Twister starts at high noon
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
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