At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize