Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
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