He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
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After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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