Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
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protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
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I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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