I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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