uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
It's Friday. Sex?
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
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I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
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So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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