all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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