just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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