I hate your face
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
You're a waste of cheezeits
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize