Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
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I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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