Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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