carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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