We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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