I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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