question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
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dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
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But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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