I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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