Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
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oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Found your dick twin last night
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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