I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize