Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Everything about him screamed your future.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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