Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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