When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize