I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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