That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
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I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
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I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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