gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize