Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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