wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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