Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
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