she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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