im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize