Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I skipped work to stalk him.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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