Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize