he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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