I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
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