She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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