So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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