I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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