Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
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We are two peas in an std pod
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
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We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize