Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(646): View more from New York

My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay

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(646): My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay http://tfl.nu/aqwf

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting

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(902): yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting http://tfl.nu/sy3h

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.

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(215): Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf. http://tfl.nu/0na3

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(847): View more from Illinois

she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom

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(847): she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom http://tfl.nu/dcxm

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.

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(803): I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene. http://tfl.nu/fj0l

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(631): View more from New York

I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.

(631): View more from New York

Cruelly.

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(631): I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away. (631): Cruelly. http://tfl.nu/5k20

Replies (23) Good night (3933) Bad night (1086)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.

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(401): All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it. http://tfl.nu/0ldz

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(319): View more from Iowa

My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.

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(319): My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home. http://tfl.nu/nin0

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer

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(+44): We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer http://tfl.nu/3muy

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?

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(401): he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid? http://tfl.nu/msiw

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(561): View more from Florida

The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.

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(561): The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year. http://tfl.nu/xsav

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(315): View more from New York

The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.

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(315): The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me. http://tfl.nu/qtoi

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(630): View more from Illinois

they sound like some classy girls.

(1-630): View more from Illinois

Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.

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(630): they sound like some classy girls. (1-630): Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting. http://tfl.nu/azgf

Replies (4) Good night (1855) Bad night (424)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler

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(517): Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler http://tfl.nu/xejb

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(214): View more from Texas

MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.

(214): View more from Texas

SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.

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(214): MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME. (214): SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME. http://tfl.nu/sfja

Replies (12) Good night (985) Bad night (259)

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