My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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