i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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