i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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